Fighting Spirits of Angels
by Alucino
Summary: Like other angels before her, Julie has now also left, leaving Kris and Kelly to once more face new arrangement at the Agency. But in the midst of it, something is bothering Kelly and the future suddenly appear even more uncertain.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's note: **

**I usually finish most of my stories before I start posting, but since I have had quite a hard time tying this one together, I thought I would start posting, hoping it will work out in the end. ****I have most of the story more or less written though so there is no doubt I will finish it.**

**The thing is that when I first started this story I had a whole different idea with it, and since then I have changed its course quite a lot and been so wrapped up in it, that I fear I have gotten a bit entangled in my own words. So what I'm trying to say is that I would really appreciate any comments/reviews on how the story appear, in a way to let me know if I'm on the right track or if I'm just totally lost. Because if I am, I will try and tidy up the story and adjust its continuation accordingly. **

**And also, since this story is set after the show ended and I haven't seen the last episode or the last season in ages, I apologize in advance if something with this story contradicts with the show. **

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"Well, I guess it's back to you and me then," Kris tried to say cheerfully to Kelly, as she saw Julie disappear into the plane. But even if she tried to sound cheerful, she couldn't help but feel a bit gloomy.

Julie had stayed with them a bit longer than Tiffany previously had, but not much. Just a couple of months longer, and now they had waved their goodbyes to also her, as she headed back to New York to finish her police education.

"Guess so…," Kelly said with a sigh, sounding even gloomier than Kris felt.

Kris looked at Kelly and when seeing she indeed didn't look too happy, she realized she'd better try to get them both in a better mood.

"Oh, so that's how it is huh?" she joked, put her hand in her pockets and looked down in the floor.

Obviously not taking too much notice to what Kris had said, Kelly just looked at her bewildered. "What?"

"I just couldn't help but notice how happy you seemed to be stuck with just me again," Kris tried again, trying to act offended, hoping her friend would take her up on her joke.

"Oh, I'm sorry," was however all Kelly absent-mindedly said, as she looked back at the plane again, obviously being lost in thoughts.

Kris sighed when noticing her friend hadn't picked up Kris' attempt to cheer her up, and instead she fell silent as well. But just a moment later she started leaving, figuring it was time for them to head back. When noticing Kelly didn't budge, she put her hand on Kelly's arm. "Kelly?"

"Huh?" was all Kelly replied a bit distractedly.

Seeing her friend was still a bit mentally absent, Kris suddenly didn't feel as urgent to leave. Instead she asked, "Wanna grab a cup of coffee?"

"Yeah, sure…," Kelly replied, actually thinking it was quite a good idea. But still a bit lost in thoughts she just automatically let herself be led away by Kris.

They walked silently over to the small coffee shop in the departure hall and ordered themselves each a cup of coffee, but as they seated themselves by a small table Kris couldn't be quiet anymore. She knew something wasn't right with Kelly, and even if she understood her friend might be a bit sad that Julie had left the Agency, she knew it was more to it than that. "Kelly, are you all right?" she wondered, going straight to the point, as she looked at her friend.

Taken a bit aback by Kris' question, Kelly just looked bewildered at her. All though, she couldn't blame Kris for wondering, because she knew she had indeed been a bit distracted. She smiled vaguely, both because she realized she hadn't been the best company and because she had made Kris concerned. "I'm fine," she then tried to convince Kris, but almost automatically, and before she really could stop herself, she continued, "it's just that..." But neither really knowing what she was about to say, or if she really wanted to talk about what was on her mind, Kelly's voice died out before she said anything more. Instead she looked down in the cup, naively hoping Kris would instead just let it be.

Obviously though, Kris wouldn't.

"It's just what?" she wondered curiously.

"Oh nothing, it's...," Kelly searched her brain for something good to say, but when realizing she had zilch, she instead just sighed, and shook her head, "…nothing."

"Kelly…" Kris started, and sighed a bit hopelessly. "I can see it's _not_ 'nothing'."

She knew Kelly was never fond talking about her thoughts and feelings, and that she in fact had the ability to distant herself from others, hiding in her own little shell when something was bothering her. But Kris wasn't quite ready to let her do that this time. At least not without trying to figure out what it was about. "Come on Kelly, you can tell me," she then continued and put a reassuring hand on her friends arm.

Knowing there was no way out of it, especially since they had a long drive back to the city from the airport when Kris could nag at her, Kelly sighed again, knowing she had to say something. It didn't necessarily had to be any profound thoughts, she figured, just something. Something that would satisfy Kris' curiosity.

"It's just that I'm tired of seeing everyone's leaving all of the time, always having to say goodbye," she then finally admitted.

"Yeah, me too," Kris said with a sigh. She and Kelly had indeed said goodbye to some of their best friends over the years, and it was never something they enjoyed.

"Sometime I just hate to be the one that's left behind, while the others go on with their lives, you know?" Kelly heard herself continue.

Kris looked at her friend a bit puzzled, not sure if she knew if she was following her anymore. "Well, I'm not quite sure if I follow you Kell…but I don't think we're left behind," she said feeling absolutely certain about that. Even if neither of them liked the fact that Julie left, or the others before her, Kris couldn't say she wasn't happy with staying behind. After all she loved working for Charlie, and with Kelly and Bosley. It was Julie's loss for leaving, not theirs.

Kelly sat silent, not really wanting to comment Kris' statement. She knew Kris wouldn't understand. Or maybe she would, but Kelly just didn't seem to have the energy, or the interest, to explain what she was getting at. She wasn't even sure if she, herself, knew what she was getting at. She just knew she was tired of seeing the other Angels leaving, when she knew she wouldn't. She would stay, stay like always, and keep on fighting. Never giving up, leaving, like the others. But not having the time to think about it, knowing Kris was waiting for a reply, she instead pushed her thoughts aside. Half-heartedly she said, "No, maybe you're right." She'd tried to sound convinced, but she knew she'd failed. But too tired to be bothered by it, she instead let out a small, almost unnoticeable sigh, and turned away from Kris, staring out in the air.

Kris looked confused at her friend. She could tell Kelly wasn't feeling her best and something was on her mind, something more than she had let on, but she also knew that with that rejection, Kelly wouldn't say anything more about the subject. She knew Kelly that well by now, that she could tell when there was no use pushing. So instead Kris figured she would try to change the subject, or at least change the tune of the discussion.

"Of course I'm right," she said brightly, hoping Kelly would be able to leave whatever thought she was bothered with for awhile.

Kelly looked back at Kris, and even if she was a bit surprised Kris obviously had let it be and had turned more unserious, she was relieved she had. She let out a small smile, almost as if thanking her for bringing the discussion to a more positive level.

When seeing she got her friend's attention, and that it seemed as if she'd succeeded to pull Kelly out from her own little world, Kris just threw her a quick look and smiled, before she took another sip of her coffee.

Really wanting to take Kris up on her suggestion of another discussion, Kelly focused not to be carried away to her thoughts that had previously so firmly clung to her mind. But obviously not being able to move far from it, she asked, "so who do you think the new angel's going to be?"

Noticing Kelly had moved on from what had been bothering her, Kris smiled vaguely before she shrugged her shoulders. "Dunno. Hopefully someone nice."

"Yeah." Kelly couldn't disagree on that.

"Hey, what if Charlie doesn't even get a new angel this time?" Kris then hopefully suggested. Even if she wouldn't mind too much getting a new partner, she would definitely prefer if it was just her and Kelly for a while. Because she did think it was tiresome to get a new partner, and it was obvious Kelly thought so as well. This far they had been lucky with their new partners, but sometime it was bound to happen that they wouldn't get along as well. And Kris had been in the business for so long now, that she knew it was very much important you got along perfectly to succeed on the cases. "Wouldn't that be nice? With just the two of us?" Kris carried on and looked optimistically at Kelly, hoping, and thinking, she would agree.

"Sure it would, but I wouldn't bet on that Kris," Kelly said with a doubtful laugh, not at all thinking Charlie would settle with that. "Charlie will arrange something, you can be sure of that," she then continued sarcastically, as she noticed her negative mood slowly was creeping up on her again.

It wasn't hard for Kris to snap up the sarcastically tone of voice in Kelly's comment, and she couldn't help but feeling a bit concerned about it. Even if she knew neither of them were too keen of getting yet another partner, that was not why Kelly sounded so bitter. She was sure of it. But not wanting them to drift off to a bad place again, Kris chose to ignore it to try to keep the discussion on its happy tone.

"Well, she might turn out good, you know. I mean she always has in the past, right?"

"Yeah…," Kelly had to agree, and even if she tried not to show it, the pessimism in her voice was distinctly prevailed again. She knew Kris was right, and she knew she had no right to be so pessimistic about a new partner, but she just couldn't help herself. Not wanting to talk about it anymore though, afraid where it would take her, she finished her coffee and pulled up some money for the bill that she put on the table. "Ready to go?"

"Uh huh…" Kris nodded and finished her coffee, actually feeling a bit relieved Kelly wanted to get going. It sure wasn't one of Kelly's best days, and Kris couldn't wait to get back home.

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The next day things were a bit more like normal and they were now waiting in the office for Charlie to call to inform them about the new arrangements. When Charlie called though, he did not mention the new angel, neither did he bring up their new case, but instead just focused on their last case they had finished a couple of days back. But as the discussion died out, Kris was too curious finding out about her new partner, and took the silent moment as a perfect moment of bringing it up.

"So who's the new angel going to be, Charlie?" she wondered as she walked over to Bosley by the desk.

"Actually, Kris, I'm not quite sure yet," Charlie replied thoughtfully through the speaker phone. "I'm working on getting a certain girl, but for now it's just going to be the two of you."

Kris looked surprised at the speaker phone. Even if she had hoped, she had figured, just like Kelly, that Charlie indeed would find someone new. He always had, and somehow he seemed to prefer his team to exist of three Angels, and not two. After all, it had never taken him long to find someone to replace the others after they had left, so why would it now? But just like she'd told Kelly yesterday, Kris really enjoyed the idea with just the two of them.

After not getting any replies, Charlie brought Kris back to reality again, as he wondered a bit concerned they wouldn't approve, "If you don't mind?"

"Mind?" Kris exclaimed cheerfully. "You're wondering if I'd mind having one of the best Angels there is all to myself? Are you kidding?" She looked at Kelly and smiled, thinking she would be as happy as she was about the new arrangements. But when she could see her friend looking deep in thoughts, Kris' good mood vanished. Instinctively Kris wondered whether Kelly was thinking about that same thing that obviously had bothered her yesterday, and she couldn't help but feeling a growing concern for her friend. Maybe it was more to it than she'd thought yesterday after all. After they had left the airport, Kelly had slowly started to lighten up and by the time Kris dropped her off at her place things were basically back to normal again, so Kris had figured it was just something temporary. Now she wasn't as sure anymore.

Apparently even Charlie could notice something wasn't right with Kelly as he could hear her absence from the discussion, "Kelly, what do you think?"

Hearing her name being mentioned, Kelly tried to dismiss her thoughts and instead looked at the speaker phone. "That sounds fine Charlie," she said trying to sound normal, but she could hear that her voice sounded constrained.

So she wasn't surprised when Charlie questioned her. "Kelly? Are you alright? You sound a bit absent-minded."

"Oh, I'm fine Charlie," she answered, pushing herself to sound a bit more normal. "I'm just a bit tired that's all," she then lied, really wanting him to drop it.

And obviously it worked, as Charlie went on talking about something else. The look Kelly got from Kris however, could tell her that her friend hadn't dropped it.

Swiftly Kelly broke their eye contact and looked out the room.

* * *

Kelly sighed resignedly as she heard the alarm clock once again started ringing. Although, the ringing didn't come as a surprise. She had snoozed it a couple of times, but instead of falling back to sleep, she had instead just been laying there, waiting for it to ring next time. Automatically she pushed the snooze button again.

She was simply not at all in the mood of getting up. Or going to work.

She sighed guiltily, as that newly-formed feeling she had about her job once again seemed to have made its presence in the pit of her stomach. She had always loved going to work, throwing herself head-first into different cases, catching bad guys and going undercover, or just meeting up with her colleagues at the office. But now she somehow just didn't have that same intriguing feeling, that hunger for it. And it disturbed her. A lot. And added to that disturbing feeling was how uninterested she appeared to be with the new arrangement at the Agency. She even felt ashamed when she saw how thrilled Kris was about working just the two of them, while she knew she gave the impression that she couldn't care less about it. But it wasn't that she didn't liked working just the two of them, or that Julie had left, it was just that…Well, she wasn't sure what it was actually.

What she did know though, which really was what was bugging her, was that she had felt a sting of jealousy when Julie told them she wanted to go back to New York, that she was leaving. The feeling had disturbed her at that moment, and it disturbed her even more so now, when it had appeared to have increased. Now it rarely left her mind for long. Not really knowing what else to make of it, she had started wondering if maybe she was ready to leave as well. But even if she couldn't quite dismiss the idea completely, it just didn't seem to be right. She had never during her five years at the agency even considered that she want to leave. She had loved it from the very start, and she had loved every moment of it, so why did she doubt it now? She loved working as a detective, didn't she?

She had been with Charlie's agency as long as there had been an agency, and she had been through it all. She had seen one after the other angel leave, and not once, until now, had she envied the one leaving. It had always been theirs loss of leaving, not the ones staying behind, just like Kris had told her the other day. But somehow it just didn't feel like that this time. This time it felt as if it was her loss for staying. When she could leave.

Leave. Kelly sighed troubled, annoyed that that word always seemed to pop up. She didn't really want to leave, did she? Because what would she do? And why would she even want to? The others had all left because they knew they wanted something else. Like Jill. Kelly remembered how Jill always had dreamed of becoming a race car driver, how she constantly had talked about it. Ever since they first met in the police force she had talked about it, and even if Jill had loved working for Charlie, Kelly knew that she one day would leave to seek that dream. Her leaving hadn't come as a surprise. It had been hard for her and Sabrina to face fact and accept it, but deep down neither of them could say it wasn't expected.

For Tiffany it had been similar. Maybe she hadn't always dreamt of becoming an attorney like Jill had about being a race car driver, but Tiffany instead knew quite quickly that she wanted something else. She never appreciated being a detective like the rest of them did, despite her natural knack for it. She was simply never completely comfortable with it, knowing she wanted something else with her life. And when she found it, when she realized she wanted to be an attorney, she had gone after it, just like she should.

And it had been pretty much the same for Julie. Just like Jill and Tiffany, Julie had left to do something else. She wanted to go back to the Police Academy to finally achieve that police license she had been working on for so long. She had known she was in the right business, but she had simply not been satisfied being a private eye without her police training. And when she'd left a couple of days ago she had told them she probably wanted to stay a cop once she got her license. She wanted to work closer to the streets, helping people to pull themselves up from a criminal life, just like Julie herself had been helped once. And Kelly didn't blame her. She knew exactly what she meant. She had been there as well. Like Julie, Kelly had lived a life on the other side of the law until she had managed to straighten herself up. Although Kelly had changed a lot since her days on the streets and she couldn't quite see herself going back working with the Police. But for Julie it was different. She would like it in the force, Kelly was sure of it.

Of all the partners Kelly had said goodbye to, it was probably only Sabrina that didn't do it because she wanted something different, a profession she wanted more or would be happier with. Sabrina was most likely also the one least subjected to leave, because compared to her fellow resigned Angels she had already been working with what she loved most. Instead she had left of purely practical reasons. Her new husband hadn't at the time been able to leave his position at the University in Vancouver, so Sabrina had instead resigned from the Townsend Agency and joined him to Canada. And then when she got pregnant she thought she could take it a bit easier for awhile as well, which was probably the reason why she hadn't found a similar job in the country up north, but instead settled with an office job at the Police. Even if Kelly was sure Sabrina was happy with what she was doing now, that was not why she had left. She would have stayed if the circumstances been different.

And just like Sabrina, Kelly loved working as a private eye more than anything. And she couldn't see herself doing anything but. Although, Sabrina had left, so why couldn't she? But Sabrina had at least left for a reason. Kelly had nothing.

Suddenly interrupting her thoughts, the alarm clock once started ringing. She sighed tiredly as she pushed her thoughts aside, knowing that this time she had to get up if she didn't wanted to be too late, or she would never hear the end of it from Bosley. Unenthusiastically she turned around and reached for the alarm clock to finally turn it off. She lingered a couple of more moments before she tiredly got up and headed for the bathroom.

Hoping to shake off some of her tiredness she walked over to the sink and soon she let the ice cold water run over her face. With the cold water still dripping down her face she looked up, but as she caught her reflection in the mirror she froze stiff, fixating her eyes on the short-cut brown hair, as painful memories came rushing back to her.

She sighed heavily, almost irritated. She just didn't seem to be able to catch a break.

It had been around five months since she had been shot in the head, and maybe three months since she was released from the hospital, and despite the time that had past, she still couldn't help but remember the attack every time she saw the hair. Except from the scar beneath it, the hair that had been shaven off for her surgery was now the only visible thing that remained from the injury. She didn't really minded the hair being so short, worse was it when they took the bandage off and she had only inches of hair. But now it wasn't that bad, it had grown out enough that people couldn't see and question what had happened to her. But still, _she_ knew. Every time she saw it, she was reminded of the pain and despair she had felt, and she hated the feeling. She hated how she kept reliving the moment, the moments that came after. But no matter how she tried to escape the memory, it always came back. She remembered the incomprehensible pain from the actual attack, the confusion and despair when she later woke up from her coma and the complete desperation the time afterwards, when she'd fought to recover. And she remembered how she just wanted to break down and give up. But that she hadn't. She had kept on struggling. Even if the doctors told her she had a long and hard struggle in front of her to recover, she had made it. Miraculously well, they even told her. She had simply pushed the despair and her urge to give up, aside, and instead just gave it all she had. Like so many times before she had just kept going, kept on fighting.

Ever since she was a little child she had been fighting, whether it was fighting to endure abuse at orphanages and foster homes, or fighting to stay alive when she'd roamed the country after she'd finally escaped her lost foster home. No, she knew what it meant to fight alright. Even if she sometime wished she didn't.

She sighed heavily and dried her face, almost as if to wash the thoughts and memories away just as much as she washed away the water. She didn't look back in the mirror again, but instead she left the washbasin and continued with her morning procedures.

She did indeed not look forward to the day.

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**That was that. I hope you liked it so far!**

**And please, please leave a review! You have no idea how much I appreciate it! =)**


	2. Chapter 2

**_I'm glad to hear that the story seems to be alright so far. Thanks for the reviews letting me know! __:)_**

**_During the first part of this chapter there is a song being played in the background, and even if I have no idea sure how well this will work, I wanted to give you the link to the song so you could have it playing in the background while you read as well. It might add to the atmosphere of the scene I try to portray. Or it might not. Like I said, I have no idea how it will work… _****_but I figured I might as well give you the possibility to try it out if you'd like. And if you don't, well, that's obviously not at all a problem. :) _**

**__****_Unfortunately I just now realize it seems as if I can't post a link here though, so if anyone is interested you can instead just go to youtube and search for _****_"Eye of the Tiger" with Survivor. A correct version seems to be the first one coming up._**

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"Good morning Los Angeles!" a bright and cheerful voice sounded from the car radio. "It looks like it's going be another beautiful day here in the city, so it's just to grab your board, rollerblades or just a wonderful spirit and get out to greet the day. I'm DJ Marty, and here's Survivor's hit "Eye of the Tiger" to start you off with a perfect morning…"

Kelly sighed jadedly at the almost sickeningly cheerful radio speaker, and sank down a bit deeper in the driver's seat, letting her left arm leave the steering wheel to instead relax on the inside of the car door. Despite the fact that it indeed was a beautiful day and she had the other night successfully solved another case with her partners, an overly-excited radio broadcaster was just not what she at the moment wanted to hear. It just didn't seemed to match with her own currently conception of the world and that others seemed to be able to feel so optimistic annoyed her. The music that now instead came from the radio was a welcomed change. But not really listening to it, she just absent-mindedly let the sound fill the car as she almost automatically drove towards the office.

Like always after a solved case Charlie had called them in to the office for a concluding meeting this morning and, despite how annoying the feeling was, she wasn't exactly looking forward to it. Not that it was anything special with the meeting, anything that entitled her indifference; she simply didn't have energy for it. But she couldn't say she wasn't surprised that she felt that way. It was the same old pessimism she had felt a lot lately.

Although, it seemed as if she quite skilfully had managed to push her thoughts aside as soon as she stepped into her role at work, careful not to let it affect either her work or let it be known by her colleagues. But now, when she wasn't on a case anymore, it seemed as if her gloominess could again gleam a bit stronger. Despite how much she disliked it.

She sighed heavily before she forced herself not to think about it. But driving the way she knew inside and out it was hard to find something else to focus on. Somehow the radio caught her unconscious attention, and even if she didn't quite realized she was listening to the song, she suddenly felt how she got even more ill at ease as she registered it's pumped up, inspirational beat and lyrics about keeping on, fighting to survive. She didn't even know how many times she heard the hit song, but somehow it this time just seemed to have some kind of influence on her. And she did not like it.

Completely wrapped up in the song, she almost didn't notice when she automatically pulled up in front of the office and turned off the ignition key. Suddenly she just didn't feel to have the energy to even get out. Disheartened she just sat there, her hands on the steering wheel, staring out the window. She didn't even notice when someone walked up to the car and tapped her window.

Startled she turned around and saw Kris standing on the other side of the window with a smile on her face. For just a brief moment the joyful sight somehow lifted her spirit and made her forget about her gloominess, but as she pulled herself back to reality again the good moment vanished just as quickly as it had appeared. Bewildered she looked back at Kris.

Seeing she got her friend's attention, Kris impatiently opened the door. "I noticed you arrived but wondered what happened when you didn't get out," she explained, before peaking inside the car wondering whatever could have kept her friend. When she could see nothing special, she instead looked puzzled at Kelly, "what are you doing?"

"Uhm…," Kelly stammered, not really knowing what she was doing herself. "Nothing," she then finished abruptly as her pessimism caught up with her. And really not in the mood to talk about it, she swiftly turned away her gaze and grabbed her purse from the passenger seat, before she quickly got out from the car.

Kris looked at her friend a bit surprised, as she automatically stepped aside to let Kelly get out. Ever since they waved Julie off at the airport more than a week ago, Kris had noticed Kelly seemed a bit edgy. During their case this week she had seemed fine enough though, but every now and then Kris had noticed small things hinting that something wasn't quite right.

But seeing Kelly was already on her way to the building, she hadn't time to stand and think about it, and instead she rushed after her.

Kelly however didn't care to wait, but still she couldn't help but frown uneasily for herself as she with hurried steps headed for the door. She knew she had left Kris a bit startled by the car, but she simply wasn't ready to face her if she decided to ask her of what was going on. Because even if she thought she had managed quite well to keep her troubles for herself, Kelly knew that Kris had figured something out. That she hadn't brought it up yet was, despite the reasons, really appreciated. And wanting it to keep it like that for as long as possible, Kelly had to force herself to try and act a bit more normal, as she noticed Kris reaching up with her.

"So did you get home alright last night?" she said as casually as she could and turned around to face her friend, as they walked through the lobby.

"Uhm…," Kris looked at her a bit bewildered at Kelly's change of heart. But understanding what her friend was getting at, Kris let it be and instead acted along. "Yeah," she nodded. And remembering how completely worn out she was after their late, and quite tiresome, stake out last night, she added with a knowing glance. "And then I stumbled straight to bed. Feel asleep the second I hit the pillow."

Kelly smiled. Although it wasn't that much because of what Kris was saying, but because she had let Kelly be for yet another time. With a distressing feeling in her stomach she couldn't help but wonder how long she would though.

Letting Kelly be absorbed in her thoughts for the time being, Kris walked silently beside her to the office.

But as they walked inside the office and saw Bosley sitting at his usual place by the desk, Kris smiled and cheerfully greeted him, "Morning Bos!"

Before any of the other two could share any greetings, the phone interrupted them. With only a nod in the angels' direction Bosley put Charlie on the speaker phone.

"Good morning angels!" they heard the familiar voice of their boss. "And congratulation on a job well done. You never stop to amaze me," Charlie continued, sounding genuinely impressed by his employees' good work at the last case.

Kelly smiled vaguely, but didn't have the energy to reply. It amazed her to how they always seemed to manage.

Kris on the other hand, seemed very much grateful for the recognition, and smiled widely. "Why thank you Charlie. That's very kind of you."

Charlie chuckled happily. "You deserve it angels. It was a tough one and you did very well," he said before he went on talking about the case. And for the continuing half hour or so the angels and Bosley filled Charlie in on what had actually happened last night, while Charlie in return briefed them on how thankful their client was that they had figuring out the truth.

"Well, like I said, you did a great job," Charlie then admitted as the information exchange ran to its end. "You almost have me convinced you don't need a third angel."

Kris smiled of yet another kind word from her boss. He really seemed to be in a good mood today. But his words did not only please her, she also got quite hopeful. "So does that mean you won't hire someone else, Charlie?" she a bit tentatively wondered, hoping with all her might he would give her a positive answer. Even if she knew Charlie was looking for someone to replace Julie, she was really hoping he wouldn't find someone in quite awhile. That he now confessed that she and Kelly managed pretty well on their own, gave her hope he might dismiss his search completely.

Much to her disappointment though, Charlie did not seem to have anything of the kind in mind.

"No I'm afraid not, Kris," he chuckled, although he couldn't help but feel sympathy for the youngest angel. But even if he really couldn't deny that the team seemed to work pretty well as a duo, he really had all intention of hiring a third angel sooner or later. "I'm still negotiating with a certain someone, and if everything runs as I hope you will soon be a trio again."

Kris sighed heavily, and glanced over to Kelly looking most disappointed.

Kelly forced herself to smile reassuringly to her friend. She really was feeling bad for Kris, because she knew how excited she was with working just the two of her. She couldn't make herself feel as excited though, despite how much she wanted to. She really hoped she would if she wasn't feeling so blue in general, but as the situation was she really couldn't. Although she did appreciate that Charlie hadn't hired a new angel yet, because she really didn't know if she had the energy dealing with a new partner at the moment.

Bosley on the other hand seemed to be the only one entirely on Charlie's side. "How is the persuasion with her going?" he eagerly wanted to know and looked at the speaker phone, hoping to get a positive reply from his boss.

Hearing Bosley's eager tone to get a new Angel in the team, Kris turned around and looked at him surprised. She knew that maybe Bosley wasn't as affected as her and Kelly with changes in the organisation, but she really hadn't expected him to sound this eager to get a new partner. In fact it puzzled her a lot, and she couldn't deny that it almost annoyed her a bit.

But for the time being she didn't say anything, as she instead turned her focus back to Charlie on the speaker phone.

"Well Bosley, I haven't talked to her for the last couple of days," Charlie admitted. "But I'm on to it. As a matter of fact, I better give her another call," he then continued, figuring he might as well give it another try right away. "I'll talk to you later."

"Persuasion?" Kelly then wondered sceptically as soon as Charlie had left them. "She needs to be persuaded?" Kelly sure didn't like the sound of that. Maybe she wasn't as engaged in the organizational changes that Kris was, but to hear someone needed to be persuaded to come work with them sure didn't sound good in Kelly's ears. Because if she had any doubts whatsoever of joining she would most certainly not be able to give it everything she had. And if there was something Kelly had learned from working at the agency for more than five years, it was that you had to give yourself completely to it, no matter what.

Automatically she sighed onerous at the thought of it as she felt weariness running over her.

"Well, she wasn't as open to it as Charlie had hoped," Bosley confessed with a troubled frown. "But don't worry, she'll come around," he then added sounding more optimistically. There really was no doubt that Bosley really wanted this new girl to join the team.

Hearing that, Kelly just turned away, suddenly not having the energy to engage in the discussion anymore.

Kelly's scepticism had not gone unnoticed by Kris, and even if she might agree, she could sense that it was mostly Kelly's current pessimism showing now. She sighed troubled, as she watched her friend drift away in her own world. But even if she felt the urge to go over to her and find out what was the matter, she let it be. Because whatever it was, Bosley didn't seemed to have realized a thing and she figured she better talk to Kelly in private. So instead she turned back to Bosley, figuring she might as well be able to try and find out more about the new potential angel. "Bos, you seem mighty eager that Charlie will nail this new one. What's so special about her anyway? I mean, who is she?"

"Oh, I'm not entitled to say just yet…," he said secretively, and straightened up his desk-pad to keep his eyes diverted from the curious angel. "But she has excellent credentials and she would without a doubt fit right in."

Kris frowned doubtfully, not at all intrigued by the information Bosley was giving her.

Not really too aware of Kris' doubts, Bosley went on more confidently, "and I just know both of you are going to love her." But not wanting to claim victory in advance, he added, "if she'll decide to join, that is."

"And how could you be so certain about that? That we'd love her, I mean?" Kris peered and looked at him dubiously.

"Let's just say I have a feeling…" he just replied slyly, before he quickly continued, "and besides, haven't the new Angels always turned out to be good?"

"Well, yeah, but…," Kris started, but didn't find the words to continue.

As if it just now occurred to him that Kris didn't seemed too pleased with the prospective of a new partner, Bosley looked at her a bit puzzled, before he instinctively turned to look at Kelly. But seeing her just staring out the window, he could tell she wasn't more convinced than Kris. With a troubled frown he felt the urge to support them they had nothing to worry about. "Just trust Charlie, will you?" he tried in a supportive voice, but still he couldn't help but smile confidently. Even if he knew from experience that his associates rarely were too keen on switching partners, and that also very much seemed to be the case this time, he just wasn't able to think everything wouldn't turn out perfectly.

Bosley's failed attempt to cheer them up went by unnoticed to the angels. Instead Kris walked over to the desk, starting to look as gloomy as Kelly lately felt, "It's just that we kind of thought it would be nice with just the two of us for awhile, you know?" She sat down on the desk heavily. "I mean, why rush into something when there actually is no need to?" Instinctively she looked over at Kelly, believing in her mind Kelly was on her side. But what her mind hadn't thought about was how Kelly seemed to slip further and further away. Seeing Kelly standing lonely by the fire place, staring out in the air, apparently not too engaged in the discussion anymore, proved it.

Kris sighed, suddenly feeling that it might not be that bad to actually get a new partner after all, if Kelly wouldn't come around soon. Annoyed with her own thought, she sighed heavily again. Apathetically she got up from the desk again, wondering whatever happened to the good old times when there was never a dull or sad moment, when everything seemed so easy and straight-forward.

* * *

Simultaneously at Charlie's office, Charlie once again dialled the number of the potential new Angel.

"Good morning Angel," he greeted as he heard her answering at the other end.

"Oh, I'm not an Angel yet, remember?" she was quick to reply, obviously neither wanting to confirm or deny Charlie's proposal.

Not at all surprised that he got a reply like that from her, he just chuckled happily, and he couldn't help but feeling quite hopeful that she would accept his offer.

So wanting to hear if she had any news to give him, he went on, "so have you thought anything more about my offer?"

"Well, I don't know Charlie," she replied honestly. "You know I haven't done that kind of work in quite some time."

"Oh you'll get the hang of it, I'm sure," Charlie said convincingly. He really had no doubts in his mind she wasn't able to do the job, and even if she didn't appear as certain, Charlie felt confident that she'd come around sooner or later.

"Yeah, maybe," she sighed, not at all feeling very convinced. The idea of working as a detective did intrigue her, and in a way she would love to accept, but still she couldn't deny she had some doubts. She knew she had the experience required, but she simply wasn't sure if she had what it took anymore. Despite how annoying the feeling itself was.

"But are you sure I won't barge in, taking that Julie's place?" she then continued to get another perspective of the matter.

"Oh, you don't have to worry about that. Julie's not coming back, and she knows she will be replaced," Charlie said confidently. And really wanting to convince her that she had nothing to worry about, he continued, "and I'm certain the other girls would love to have you in her place." He knew the two current angels were both a bit resistant of getting a new partner, but he had no doubts in his mind whatsoever that they wouldn't accept her with open arms. But when he didn't hear her replying, he continued, "and Bosley of course would love to have you too."

"Hmm…," she just mumbled in reply as she tapped her fingers nervously at the table. Maybe Charlie was right, but still she couldn't help the anxious feeling in the pit of her stomach.

"Hey…," she then interrupted her own indecisiveness. "I have some stuff to tend to the following week, but what do you say if I'll leave you my final decision sometime during the beginning of next week?"

"Sounds good," Charlie said smilingly in the other end. "I will patiently be waiting for your call."

"Talk to you later then?" she then said, but just as they were about to hang up, she quickly added, "Oh and Charlie, no matter my decision, I'm flattered that you thought of me." She couldn't deny that despite her doubts and no matter what she would decide, it really was an honour to even be considered.

"What can I say, you're one of the best," he chuckled confidently. "And to me you're always an angel, no matter how much you'll try to deny it."

She smiled appreciatively, not being able to deny that maybe he was right. Maybe she was an angel after all. Maybe there was just no way out of it. But still wanting to think things over, she said goodbye and hung up.

* * *

Back in the office the atmosphere hadn't improved much. But with not more to do there anymore, since the case was solved and they didn't have anything new yet, Kelly figured she might as well leave. Neither Kris nor Bosley had much else to do though, and thought they would hang around for a while. But as Kelly said her unenthusiastically goodbyes to them and walked outside, Kris couldn't take it anymore. She knew Kelly wouldn't want to talk about it, and she figured she would even try to push it away if Kris asked her about it, but Kris knew they couldn't go on like this anymore. She had to talk to her. So quickly she jumped up from the sofa, hoping she would be able to catch her before she left.

"I just thought of something I had to do," she lied and started heading for the door. But seeing Bosley's jaw drop, being stood up like that, she couldn't help but feel a bit sorry for him. But she had to do this, and Bosley didn't actually mind, did he? But not having time to hang around if she wanted to catch Kelly before she left, she couldn't stay and make sure he was ok. Although not wanting to leave him completely in the lurch, she hurried over to him, and quickly planted a kiss on his cheek. "Sorry Bos," she then said a bit sheepishly, before she rushed out the door.

"Hey Kelly, wait up!" she called as she reached the street and saw Kelly about to get into her car.

Hearing her name being called, Kelly turned around and could see Kris rushing after her. A bit puzzled by her friend's obvious impatience to get to her, Kelly just looked at her surprised. "Kris, what is it?" she wondered as her friend reached her.

"Uhm, I…," Kris started at a loss, not really knowing what to say. She knew she couldn't just come out with her question, but as she quite spontaneously had rushed after Kelly, she hadn't really given it any thought how she would start. "I just wanted to talk to you," she then said however, still frantically trying to come up with some kind of excuse.

"Alright," Kelly conceded. "What about?"

"Uhm…," Kris again mumbled, still not knowing what to say. "Oh, I just thought you might like to join me for some lunch?" she then blurted out, relieved to have figured something out.

A bit surprised that was what Kris so stressed had rushed after her to ask, it took a moment or two, before Kelly answered.

"Oh, I don't know Kris. I…," she then started and glanced over at the car, about to continue with some excuse.

"My treat," Kris quickly interrupted, not letting Kelly finish her excuse, when she noticed she was about to be turned down.

But not at all being in the mood, Kelly was about to shake her head and say no.

Kris however felt by now very confident she would somehow get Kelly to talk about whatever was bothering her, so she simply wouldn't take no for an answer. "Come on Kelly. We never do that anymore," she said before continuing most honestly, "And I miss it."

Kelly sighed. And this time it was not because she felt down, but that Kris was right. It was quite awhile they had spent some of their free time together, and just like Kris, she did miss it as well. She smiled affirmative, suddenly feeling quite pleased Kris had asked. "Alright."

Hearing she had won her over, Kris smiled and exhaled relieved.

A moment later they drove away.

Not really wanting to spring her questions at her, Kris let it be for awhile, and instead they had a really nice and pleasant lunch together. Actually they had a great time, laughing and talking together, and Kris could almost not believe this was the same Kelly that been so grumpy the last couple of days. Because all through lunch she was the Kelly Kris knew and loved, and it was great to see. They actually had such a good time, Kris just didn't want to spoil it by bringing up things that for sure would end their great time, so instead she kept silent.

But as they were driving home, many hours later, Kris couldn't help but feeling a bit annoyed at herself that she hadn't brought it up. After all that was why she had invited Kelly to lunch in the first place. And she knew that even if Kelly seemed perfectly fine now, she could tell she wouldn't be tomorrow again. Because as a matter of fact, for the last couple of days when she'd noticed Kelly being troubled, it appeared to come and go, and sometimes she was quite herself again. After all, she had been acting ok enough for neither Bosley nor Charlie to notice a thing.

As Kelly pulled up outside of Kris' beach house to drop her off, Kris had at first thought she could maybe talk to her about it tomorrow instead, but as she was about to get out she changed her mind. So instead she stopped herself with what she was doing and turned back to her friend.

"Kelly?" she looked at her, before somewhat tentatively said, "there was actually something I wanted to talk to you about…"

"Oh? What about?"

"Well…," she started with a sigh, not really knowing how to go on. "It's just that I've noticed you haven't been quite yourself lately," she then said directly, never being good to beat about the bush anyway.

Hearing Kris' intention, Kelly's good mood she'd had all through lunch, vanished in an instant, and without a word she just broke their eye contact and angrily stared out the window. She just couldn't believe her. First she'd invited her to lunch, getting her in a good mood and everything, just to dump this on her in the last minute. She had figured Kris would bring it up sooner or later, but to do it like this was just plain deceitful, Kelly thought angrily for herself. But either way, it was now done, and Kelly knew there was no use arguing with her. No matter what Kelly would say, she knew Kris wouldn't give up until she got what she wanted. But still she didn't at all feel like being very cooperative.

Seeing Kelly reacted in one of the many ways Kris had feared, she just bit her lip, starting to doubt it was such a good idea after all, bringing it up. But knowing she couldn't go back now, she kept going. "And I was just wondering if you maybe wanted to talk about it?"

"No, I don't want to talk about it!" Kelly quickly blurted out, as she turned back to Kris, glaring angrily at her. Maybe Kris only wanted to help, but Kelly couldn't help but feeling nothing but annoyed and mad at her at this moment for butting in.

Kris couldn't deny she got a bit nervous about Kelly's sudden and harsh reply, not at all thinking she would get this upset by her proposition. But still, she didn't want to give up.

"But maybe I can help?" Kris persisted, trying to offer her support. Because that was all she wanted to do after all. Help. Why couldn't Kelly see that?

"No, you can't! Alright?"

"But Kelly I'm you're friend! Why won't you talk to me with whatever is bothering you?" Kris now desperately cried out, starting to sense Kelly wouldn't give in, no matter how much Kris would push and no matter how much it pained her that Kelly rather wanted to carry her burden alone than to share it with her best friend.

"Because maybe it doesn't concern you Kris! And maybe I don't want your help!" Kelly now angrily yelled back, completely fed up with Kris nag. Again she turned away and looked out the window with clenched teeth.

"Now could you please get out of my car so I could go home?" she then said coldly, not even bothering looking at her.

Completely miserable, feeling both angry and sad she'd failed so enormously and even managed to make the situation considerably worse, Kris just sat silent for a second or two, not wanting to leave Kelly when they were on such bad terms. But as she looked back at Kelly who was staring madly out the window, she knew it was too late. Kris had made her move and she had failed. Big time. She couldn't stop the tears welling up in her eyes, blaming herself for making such a mess of things. But knowing it wouldn't help to stay any longer she opened the door reluctantly, and slowly got out. She threw a quick glance back at Kelly, almost hoping she would stop her, but almost before she had shut the car door Kelly stepped on the gas and disappeared.

It wasn't until quite awhile later Kelly finally slowed down. She exhaled angrily, but tried to unclench her teeth and loosen up her tight grip from the steering wheel. She didn't even know who she was most angry at, her or Kris. She knew she had over-reacted a bit, or maybe even more than a bit, but she just got so annoyed at Kris always butting in, never leaving her alone when she specifically asked her to. Although, maybe she needed to talk to someone, someone who could help figuring out her problems, someone who could tell her what was bothering her. But the very thought of it troubled her. She didn't want to talk to anyone. She wanted to figure it out on her own. Or she wanted to be able to drop it.

Furiously she hit the steering wheel hard with the palm of her hand at the thought of it. She knew she couldn't drop it, no matter how much she wanted to. She knew she had to deal with it. Somehow.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

**Sorry for taking awhile to update. I ****had a moment where I suddenly lost confident and interest in the story. But then, for like the eleventh time now, I decided to change the course of the story and have now spent some time doing some rewriting.**

**And I really want to thank you again for reviewing. Especially I want to thank Lis, who really gave me a push to keep going. Without people's comments I would for sure just have given up. I'm glad you made me continue, because now I'm back on track again and lovin' it :)**

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* * *

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Kris lifted up her surf board somewhat half-heartedly as she stepped up from the water. After they had solved their last case a couple of days ago, Charlie hadn't assigned them anything new, and like she often did on days when neither work nor anything else required her time, Kris had spent the morning out on the water. And usually she loved it. She could spend hours just waiting for that perfect wave. This time she had lacked that usual enthusiasm, and she had lost interest surprisingly quickly. She had actually lacked most of her normal high-spirited enthusiasm throughout these last couple of days.

She walked up a bit on the beach before she laid down the board in the sand. Jadedly she sat down next to it, staring out over the widespread ocean before she sighed troubled. She knew why she felt so unenthusiastic, why she couldn't rejoice over the things she usually loved and why she wasn't happy over this small break the circumstances had given her and her partners. Things were simply not as they should be. She hadn't heard from or seen Kelly since the other day when Kelly so furiously had shoved her out from her car, driven away from her as she miserably was left behind on the sidewalk. And it troubled her. Not only was she concerned that she hadn't yet heard from her friend, but also she was worried over the way Kelly had acted. It really proved that Kelly was a lot more troubled than Kris first had thought. But despite the fact that Kelly apparently was troubled by something, Kris couldn't help but feel a bit angry as well. She knew she might have been pushing a bit too much the other day, but she really couldn't find a good reason for Kelly to act like she did, or for her to ignore her like she now obviously did. It really wasn't like her friend at all. Even if work hadn't required for them to meet as it usually did, it wasn't at all customary for them to let days pass by like this without talking to each other. Even on their spare time they often spent time together, or at least talk to each other over the phone. They had always done that, and not only her and Kelly, but all of them. She had always spent more time with her partners than they actually had to, that the job required of them. That was simply how it worked. If she didn't hear from one of her partner, she always talked to the other. But now there hadn't been a single word in days from anyone from the agency. And it felt strange. Maybe the fact that they were one less angel to hear from, also contributed to why it felt so strange. That she and Kelly hadn't talked since their fight, was however her main concern.

She had thought about calling her, but she had decided against it. It was not her call to make. Kelly was the one that had shut her out.

So instead she had waited. Waiting for her friend to make a move.

She looked down in the sand, and automatically she started drawing circles with her fingers in the warm sand. Even if she rarely complained when Charlie gave them days off, she now actually wished that he or Bosley would call telling her they got a new case. It would end this disturbing situation when she didn't know what was going on.

Lost in thoughts, she sat watching the waves crashing against the shore, and didn't notice when Kelly's mustang pulled up by her house.

Kelly lingered for just a second before she got out from the car. She had delayed herself for days to approach Kris since their fight, and now when she finally had get a grip on herself and come over, there was no use to linger another moment. She didn't really know what to say to her friend though, but she knew it was high time for her to say something, and to apologize. She had been feeling guilty ever since she got home that other day, and during the last couple of days her guilt had only appeared to increase. But still she hadn't done anything, instead just let the time pass her by. Because even if she wanted to tell Kris she was sorry, she simply dreaded the moment when she would, because then she knew she would have to explain why she had reacted like she had. And how to do that, she didn't know. So instead she had lingered. Maybe she had assumed that Charlie would call them in for a new case and that she then would have to face Kris again. And even if the very thought of getting a new case still wore her down, the perspective would at least make her deal with one of her problems. But Charlie hadn't called, nor had Bosley. So this morning she had finally taken the decision on her own, and headed over to Kris. She still hadn't figured out how she would explain certain things to her friend, but she knew she had to at least apologize to her.

She glanced over the beach, figuring her chances of finding her friend outside were pretty much as high as finding her inside. They had the day off after all, and if Kelly knew her friend right, Kris would most probably not be cocooned inside her house but instead somewhere out on the beach. And as expected, Kelly quickly noticed her wet suit-clad friend sitting next to her surf board a bit down the beach. A vague smile escaped Kelly's lips that her assumption hadn't been wrong, before she started walking over towards her friend.

When Kris showed no sign that she'd noticed Kelly walking up behind her, Kelly somewhat tentatively said, "Kris?"

Hearing her name, Kris automatically turned around. But when seeing Kelly there, Kris did of some reason not say anything, but instead just looked up at her with an empty gaze.

Not really knowing what to make of the expression on her friend's face, Kelly bit her lip uneasily. Maybe she had waited too long to apologize, she thought, annoyed at her own procrastination. But knowing there was only one thing to do, no matter how hard Kris might make it for her, she didn't let her concern bother her. Instead she gestured at the spot next to Kris, as if to ask if she could sit down. "May I?"

Kris nodded a bit listlessly, but as Kelly sat down next to her, slight signs of vitality slowly started to break through in her previously blank face. But still she didn't say anything, and instead just looked out over the water.

Not really knowing what to say, Kelly let silence prevail for a short moment.

"I'm sorry I haven't come by earlier," she then started honestly, and looked at her friend. "I wanted to, but…," she then continued, but as she realized she didn't really have an excuse, her words died out, as well as her eyes diverted. But knowing there really only was one way to say what she wanted to say, she tried again, "Well, I just want you to know that I'm sorry about the other day. I had no right to snap at you the way I did."

Kris tilted her head a bit uncomfortably and bent over to rest her arms on her knees, while looking down in the sand where her fingers yet again mechanically started making circles. "That's ok…," she then said, and even if she didn't know why, she sounded quite indifferently. She had after all waited, hoping, for Kelly to come by and talk to her about the other day, so why did she reject her now? But despite feeling annoyed of her own assumed apathy, she didn't do anything to show it. Instead it almost made her look even more uninterested in Kelly's confession.

Kelly frowned troubled, but not letting Kris' obvious resistance stop her, she continued, "No, it's not. I know I've been acting really badly, and I'm sorry. I really am." She now looked straight at Kris, really wanting to make sure Kris understood how sorry she was, while hoping she would accept her apology.

Feeling Kelly's eyes on her, Kris looked up, and seeing the sincerity in Kelly's eyes she could tell she really was sorry. And if that look was all that was needed, Kris' strange apathy she seemed to have adapted previously, eroded.

"Alright," Kris conceded, and even gave her friend a vague, but sincere, smile.

Sensing by Kris' smile that she forgave her, Kelly smiled gratefully. It was strange, sometimes they really didn't need to talk things out for them to understand each other. Things like a simple look, like now, were all that was required.

"But I'm sorry too," Kris then confessed and straightened her back up a bit, figuring she really owed her friend an apology as well. "I guess I was pushing a bit too much." She paused for awhile, before sighing heavily and looked over at her friend. "But you know me, never being able to let thing go…," she continued sarcastically, now instead feeling mostly annoyed at herself.

Kelly smiled understandingly. She knew indeed how Kris, or both the Munroe sisters for that matter, could be a bit intense at times. But this time she didn't blame her one bit. "Oh you don't have to feel bad about that Kris," she said convincingly. "You had all the right to. You were just trying to help and I was just too stubborn to let you."

Kris smiled, and not only because Kelly held no grudge against her, but because it really pleased her to hear that Kelly confessed that something had been troubling her. That was the cause for this whole situation after all, and even if Kelly apparently hadn't been ready to talk about it last time, Kris now got hopeful she was more willing to share it.

"And I really do appreciate you effort," Kelly continued sincerely. "Even if I had a strange way of showing it...," she added sarcastically, really annoyed with herself that she hadn't let her friend help her when she so kindly offered. Shamefully she looked back up at Kris.

Sensing a more cheerful tune was in order, Kris raised her eyebrows, and with a vague, but somewhat playful smile, she admitted facetiously, "well, I don't think I can disagree on that…"

Pleased that Kris, as so many times before, turned a moment of despondency to something brighter, Kelly let a small laughter escape her, as she gave Kris a friendly nudge in the side and smiled thankfully to her.

Happy to have lifted her friend's spirit, Kris let herself join in with Kelly's momentarily cheerfulness. But after awhile she turned serious again, "But just so you know, my offer from the other day still stands. If there's anything you want to talk about, I'm here."

"Alright," Kelly nodded and smiled. "Thanks," she then added sincerely.

Kris offered a comforting smile back, before they both fell silent.

Even if she didn't really want to, Kelly knew this was the moment for her to come clean about her troubles. She could simply not convince herself why she shouldn't, despite how much she might try. Kris deserved to know. And maybe, just maybe, it would actually help to talk about it. She took a deep breath as if to give her confident, before she looked at Kris. "Well, you were right the other day," she confessed, not really knowing how else to start. "Something has been bothering me."

Kris smiled vaguely, happy that Kelly finally was about to trust her with her problems. She watched her friend, waiting for her to go on. But when she didn't, but instead just sat there, looking down on her hands that was fidgeting on her knees, Kris reckoned she'd help her along. Determined she put a composed hand on her friend's. "Kelly…" she urged her to look at her. When she got eye contact, she offered an encouraging smile, "please, tell me."

"Well, to tell you the truth Kris…," Kelly sighed before she admitted honestly, "I don't know what it is." She shrugged her shoulders in annoyance. Even if she now finally was about to share her troubles with Kris, and had days to think about it, she simply didn't know what to tell her.

But knowing she had to say something, she went on automatically, "I've just been so tired of everything lately. Tired and confused. I didn't really know what to make out of it, but then when we waved Julie off at the airport the other day, I just somehow felt so jealous of her." She paused for a second, still annoyed that she'd been envious of Julie, before she continued sincerely, "that she could just get up and leave, just like that. When I felt so stuck." She looked at Kris, hoping she would understand what she was telling her, because Kelly sure didn't. Seeing Kris just waited for her to go on, Kelly sighed.

"I mean, she just left everything and went on with something else," she sighed hopelessly and looked down on her hands. "Like they all have. They have all just come and gone. But I'm still here," she continued a bit edgy, with a shrug mixed with a despair and agitation. Without really being able to stop herself she agitatedly carried on, exclaiming quite exasperated, "I was here more than five years ago when Charlie first opened this goddamn agency, and I'm still here!" Really worked up by that annoying feeling in her stomach, she gave the sand a light kick with her foot. It felt as if the answer for her problems was right there in front of her, bugging her, teasing her. But she just didn't want to accept it. She didn't want to admit to herself she wanted out.

Kris had just been sitting there, listening patiently at her friend, trying to understand. But as she could hear her friend getting all worked up, Kris looked at her bewildered, not at all being ready for this. "So what are you saying Kell? That you wanna leave?" she questioned her a bit too boldly than she had planned.

Kelly looked back at Kris, feeling quite bewildered herself. Even if she couldn't quite blame Kris for asking, she still hadn't quite expected it, and it had thrown her off guard. But mostly she was probably surprised to actually hear that question she had wondered about, but never really dared to answer.

She frowned troubled, calming herself down in the process, and as if her mind was one step ahead of her, she could hear herself silently answer, "No, I don't." Surprised what she heard, knowing it hadn't been quite true, she was quick to correct herself, "maybe."

She looked over at Kris, and feeling somehow her last comment wasn't quite the truth either, she just sighed heavily. "Or I don't know."

Kris didn't take much notice to Kelly's uncertainty. All Kris noticed was that Kelly apparently had given the idea of leaving a thought. She was considering leaving.

Kris sank down in her seat, feeling not only surprised but very much sad as well. She knew Kelly had been bothered with something, but she had not expected it to be something like this. She had just figured it was something she could help her deal with and that they hopefully would be able to move on from. Not that she wanted to leave. "Oh…," Kris said silently and looked down in the sand.

Kelly looked at Kris troubled. She hadn't planned on giving Kris the impression she wanted to leave, because she didn't want her to be bothered by it if Kelly wasn't sure. But that was clearly too late now. It was obvious Kris thought she wanted to resign. Anxious to explain herself, Kelly hurriedly went on, "I mean, I don't think I'm actually thinking about leaving, I'm just…" Not knowing how to go on, her words died out. "I'm just a bit confused about everything, that's all," she then finally continued with a sigh.

As if Kris hadn't heard a word of what Kelly just had said, Kris silently spoke. "You know I won't like it if you'll decide to resign, but I can't make you stay if you don't want to." She looked up at her friend, and Kelly could see the disappointment in her eyes. "And if you want to leave, I want you to tell me."

Kelly sighed troubled. "Listen, it's not like that," she started. "I just need to figure some stuff out." She went silent and looked down at her hands, not really knowing how to convince her friend not to be too concerned about it. "Please Kris, just bare with me for awhile," she then pleaded, before looking back up at her friend.

Kris however didn't say anything, nor did she look back at the pleading angel. No matter if Kelly would decide to stay, Kris couldn't help but feeling upset that she even considered not to. Maybe she hadn't any right to feel this way, but she did. The very thought of Kelly leaving felt so strange, so distant. While all of their other partners had left, Kelly was the one that always had stayed. It had always been the two of them staying, and Kris simply couldn't picture how it would be to not have Kelly as her partner.

Kelly just looked at her friend, wondering agitatedly what she was thinking, and what Kelly possibly could say to make her feel better. But not getting the chance to say anything the distant sound from a ringing phone suddenly interrupted her thoughts.

The two angels looked over at the house a bit absent-mindedly, but quickly brought back to reality Kris got up. In a way she was relieved the phone had interrupted them, and she couldn't make herself feel bad to leave Kelly behind sitting lonely on the beach, as she hurried over to the house to answer the phone.

Kelly watched her friend as she rushed over to the house. She sighed troubled. She didn't really know what to think of the outcome from the confession that she for days, weeks even, had dreaded to give Kris. Even if she knew there was more to her problems than she had said, she still hadn't managed to figure out what it was, and she knew she had told Kris everything she could tell. Even if it now felt as if it had come out all wrong.

Jadedly she got up from the sand, figuring she might as well join her friend at the house. She picked up the surf board her friend had left behind, and walked over to the house and leaned it towards the wall, before she quite wearily walked up the stairs.

As she reached the top stairs she saw her friend standing by the phone on the porch.

"Yeah, she's here," Kris said to the person in the phone, and gave Kelly a quick glance. But with an almost inaudibly sigh she a moment looked away, and instead focused on listening to the person on the other end. But not many moments past until she spoke again, "alright Bos, see you in half an hour."

Sounding as if the discussion on the phone with Bosley had ended, Kelly waited patiently for Kris to turn back to her.

But as if she didn't really wanted to hang up, Kris lingered with the phone in her hand. Slowly she then put it back on the table, but still with her hand on the receiver, Kris kept looking down on the phone. The very accustomed call from Bosley that a new case awaited them, had rarely felt as awkward as it now did. She looked up at Kelly with an uncomfortable gaze. "Time to go to work," she then said awkwardly, feeling distressingly aware that maybe Kelly now wasn't set for new cases. Almost a bit afraid of what she would see in her friend's eyes, Kris quickly diverted her own eyes. Instead she left Kelly standing alone by the railing as she hurried inside to put on some decent clothes, before they quite uncomfortably would head back to the office together.

* * *

So without really bringing up Kelly's possible resignation anymore, the two angels went back to work on their new case. Even if it was with somewhat of reluctance and awkwardness. But even if something of a tension appeared to develop between them, it didn't affect their usual professionalism, and their tight team work they had built up during years working together was as impeccable as always.

And while they were letting themselves be occupied with work, their potential new partner arrived to the city. It was not that she was back to accept Charlie's offer - she still wanted to give it some more thought - but the very notion of talking to Charlie earlier had given her the urge to return to one of the many cities she had once called her home. She had been wanting to go back for quite some time, had even planned to numerous of occasion, but it had simply never worked out. She was pleased that it now finally had. Maybe she wouldn't be back for good, but at least she would be back for a short while, and that thought alone was very much pleasant.

Her own annoying indecisiveness about Charlie's offer didn't even bother her now, as she a moment earlier had arrived at Los Angeles airport. First she had thought it would feel strange to come back - she had even been a bit nervous - but to now walk the ground of the much familiar airport, she was amazed at how at home she already felt. And much to her satisfaction the feeling had really made her pervious nervousness to subside.

Excited by her new confidence and eager to head in to the city, she walked towards the exit with determined steps. But the moment she opened the doors to walk outside a wall of stifling heat hit her, and instantly it threw her off her stride. Completely overwhelmed by the hot and sultry air, it took a moment before she managed to regain her senses and accustom herself with the thick air.

Still a bit taken aback, she didn't noticed when a taxi driver got out from one of the many taxis by the curb and approached her, "the heat got to you huh?"

A bit bewildered she looked up and seeing the middle-aged man looking at her with an understanding smile, she frowned a bit troubled. Apparently she looked as unaccustomed to the heat as she felt.

"Eh, yeah, seems like it," she then answered, feeling a bit annoyed that she got so affected by the climate she once was so used to. Maybe she wasn't as at home as she first thought after all.

"Don't worry, you'll get used to it," the man smiled comforting, before changing the subject, "need a cab?"

Happy to get going, and frankly also to get into an air-conditioned cab, she nodded. "Yeah, thanks," she said as she handed him her suitcase.

"It's not that bad now though," the man carried on cheerily, as he put the suitcase in the trunk of the car. "It's still spring. Just wait until mid-summer, then you get real heat."

Hearing the man obviously took her for an ignorant out-of-towner, she forced a smile. She remembered a time when she hadn't been able to even imagine that she once wouldn't call Los Angeles her home. But that had obviously changed. She frowned slightly uneasy by the thought, before she pushed it aside and got into the car.

A couple of minutes later they were on their way into the city, and as she watched the surroundings rush by outside the window, the nervousness that previously had subsided, started to make its way back to her again. Even if she recognized her surroundings like it had been yesterday she had seen it last, it still felt like ages ago. So many things had happened since last time, so much had changed. And she knew she had changed. That was probably the reason why she felt so nervous to be back. And why she yet hadn't given Charlie her final decision. But soon she would. Even if she loved to be back just for the sake of being back, there were indeed decisions to make, practicalities to sort out. But first she had family and friends to meet.


End file.
